MORE FARTS

I wandered through to the porch yesterday afternoon, after my extended lunchtime nap.
Fart was sitting on the floor in the sun, reading a magazine. I walked over and sat on the page he was reading – as us kitty kats do!

He looked at me ... I looked at him.
‘Uhhhhm!!! Brushing is it?’ he said – the staring stand-off was getting through to him. He is a very deep specimen is our fart!! It takes forever before your stare reflects off anything inside and bounces back. You know...like radar?

Whilst brushing my gorgeous bod he said, ‘I have been looking at getting you an electric warm blanket through mail order.'
The electric warm blanket sounded like fresh trout ... and then the mail order bit sunk in.
‘No!’ I thpat at him, ‘I have you to contend with. And one male is enough. Do not, I repeat do not order any more males.’

I had to go and lie down for a while – the shock!
Ohhhhhhhhhh, my head hurts!